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Literature Text
The gun click-clacked in his hands,
The centerpiece rolled over,
Locking another bullet into place.
'You see; there's one thing different,
Between you and I,'
He said, spit flying from his mouth.
I watched on as he weighed his weapon,
Feeling it against his skin,
Adjusting his strength and eyesight.
'You're a foolish boy; a marauder's son,
Defenseless and incapable,'
He spoke, words flying off his tongue.
He lifted his pistol in line with his eyesight,
Examined me down the barrel,
Examining me; his inevitable target.
'You come out here, eyes red with fury,
But you're just so immature,'
He scoffed, cocking his gun with ancient fingers.
I adjust my stance, ready for the impact,
Time slows as his finger contracts,
Eyes slanted with anger and rage.
'You're a boy, young and inexperienced,
Without weapon or reason,'
He grinned, his finger pulling back on the trigger.
Speaking for the first time in this confrontation,
I opened my mouth, my tongue dancing,
And with five words, his world came crashing down.
'Shoot me. I dare you.'
The centerpiece rolled over,
Locking another bullet into place.
'You see; there's one thing different,
Between you and I,'
He said, spit flying from his mouth.
I watched on as he weighed his weapon,
Feeling it against his skin,
Adjusting his strength and eyesight.
'You're a foolish boy; a marauder's son,
Defenseless and incapable,'
He spoke, words flying off his tongue.
He lifted his pistol in line with his eyesight,
Examined me down the barrel,
Examining me; his inevitable target.
'You come out here, eyes red with fury,
But you're just so immature,'
He scoffed, cocking his gun with ancient fingers.
I adjust my stance, ready for the impact,
Time slows as his finger contracts,
Eyes slanted with anger and rage.
'You're a boy, young and inexperienced,
Without weapon or reason,'
He grinned, his finger pulling back on the trigger.
Speaking for the first time in this confrontation,
I opened my mouth, my tongue dancing,
And with five words, his world came crashing down.
'Shoot me. I dare you.'
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A poetry commission prize for 
She won a tied third place in #PennedPaper's 'Changing Relationship' contest.
She gave me the line 'Shoot me. I dare you' which I had to incorporate into a poem in any way I saw fit and this is what I did.
I hope you like it, I certainly had fun writing it
She won a tied third place in #PennedPaper's 'Changing Relationship' contest.
She gave me the line 'Shoot me. I dare you' which I had to incorporate into a poem in any way I saw fit and this is what I did.
I hope you like it, I certainly had fun writing it
© 2010 - 2024 Phantom-Wolf42
Comments5
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Overall Vision Originality Technique ImpactHow intense. The words flow while the emotions definately make themselves known. The intense moment is expressed in the most opportune ways- in dialogue! It takes many writers countless tries to write such a thing. The emotions are twisted around the meain personna, with the gun in his hands. While the perceivably, victim is indeed on the wrong end. The beginning catches your attention and drags you into the setting, forcing the reader to create their own image and get lost in the dialogue. It's captivating, in the least to listen to the two people bicker back and forth, while the life of one hangs in the ballance of the conversation. He speaks his last words, cocks the gun and aims..."Shoot me. I dare you."..."And with five words i tore his world apart." The words are liquid to the reader's ears...Liquid emotion.